Monday, March 13, 2017

President Trump Announces Sale of S. California to Mexico

WASHINGTON (AP) - at 12:15 p .m .today President Trump disclosed that he has reached an agreement with Enrique Pena Nieto, President of Mexico, which provides for the sale of all but the northern part of the State of California to the country of Mexico. President Trump noted that this deal, which he claims "is his largest real estate deal ever", is a win-win for everyone involved. One of the benefits he says he will highlight during a prime time address from the oval office later this evening, will include using the proceeds received by the US from Mexico to
 
1) pay for the Wall (fulfilling yet another campaign promise), a wall which will now include most of the length of the eastern border of California
2) fund all the infrastructure spending in the remaining 49 states
3) pay to relocate the 67 Republicans that currently reside in California.
 
 
He also noted that Federal money saved from the reduction of California citizens on US social programs will allow those social programs to be cash positive in less than 3 years. Mexican President Nieto announced that he has already introduced a bill to the Mexican Congress asking to rename California to MexiCal.
 
Other benefits President Trump intends to discuss during this evening's prime time address include: California will now be able to act as a sanctuary state within Mexico noting that there is much more room for the refugees who will find the climate in the State of California more desirable than the climate in US cities such as NYC, Detroit or Chicago.
 
The U.S. taxpayer will no longer be on the hook for any future disaster relief required once the next megaquake hits California. 
 
The space in the Capitol and other DC buildings vacated by representatives of California will be fumigated and turned into "time-out rooms" for the press as well as Liberty Centers where US citizens can meet with their congressmen to discuss the pursuit of economic freedom. 
 
Nancy Pelosi released a statement stating that she looks forward to making the Mexican President's life miserable and prefers the year round weather in Mexico City to that of DC.
The exact northern border of the new MexiCal is still under negotiation. Apparently the White House is concerned that certain members of congress may be unwilling to give up California's wine country ,and are suggesting that the northern border align with the north end of the Golden Gate Bridge.
 
Mexican President Nieto stated he is thrilled with the deal and is looking forward to declaring Spanish the national language for his newly acquired territory and opening ESL (English as a second language) schools throughout California.
 
White House representatives refused to confirm rumors that a similar deal was in the works for the sale of Northeastern states from NY through Maine, to Canada.
 
President Trump wrapped up his statement stating, " This deal is HUGE and will help  make America, albeit a little smaller,  great  again" ."
__._,_.___

Posted by:
FairSharFairShar@aol.com

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

What a Crock ! What Delusional Idiot Came Up With This Crap? Talking About Fiction ! Really Way Out There ! And I Mean Way Far Out There Like a Insane Asylum Thinking Out There in The words Of Bugs Bunny "What a Maroon" Damn

Unknown said...

That's a funny, now all the Hollywood liberal heros can speak Spanish and get the government they want.

Anonymous said...

Lol! Hahahahahaha! America should be so lucky as to get rid of hollyweird's crew.

Anonymous said...

If this is SATIRE, it should be labelled. I hate lies and I hate liars. Truth is sacred and should not be compromised, even as a joke.

Freewill said...

This is so far out there that if someone can't tell it is satire just by the title, then they shouldn't be on the net in the first place. They need to go back to their video games. We shouldn't have to map it out for them!

Freewill said...

Ahh. Someone with enough intelligence to see this for what it is! Congratulations on graduating from school! Unlike some of the other commenters on this blog. I was expecting more comments criticizing on the legitimacy of this article instead of the humor of it. I thought it was funnier than hell... Many of us know better.

Dan said...

The laugh here would be D.C. would lose much of its Income Tax and other revenue from just the lower 10 counties as they hold 60% of California's population with 22.8 million people, as well as the other counties above San Bernardino County would include the largest Military Base, China Lake Naval Weapons Center, which then Mexico would have access and thus an Easy Fight against the USA!

justacitizen said...

I really feel stupid that I read this. I even tried to find it on AP to see if it was true.

Freewill said...

I have an update on this. Trump did put this out. Trump put this out as a teaser only.

Freewill said...

I am however surprised it does not appear on other websites and blogs. Must have been sent directly to me for some purpose. Wouldn't surprise me none.