Friday, February 8, 2013

Four Of The Year's Best Comeback Responses



Four Of The Year's Best Comeback Responses


NUMBER 1:


If you ever testify in court, you might wish you could have been as sharp as this policeman. He was being cross-examined by a defense attorney during a felony trial. The lawyer was trying to undermine the police officer's credibility.


Q: 'Officer --- did you see my client fleeing the scene?'


A: 'No sir. But I subsequently observed a person matching the description of the offender, running several blocks away.'


Q: 'Officer, who provided this description?'


A: 'The officer who responded to the scene.'


Q: 'A fellow officer provided the description of this so-called offender. Do you trust your fellow officers?'


A: 'Yes, sir. With my life.'


Q: 'With your life? Let me ask you this then officer. Do you have a room where you change your clothes in preparation for your daily duties?'


A: 'Yes sir, we do!'


Q: 'And do you have a locker in the room?'


A: 'Yes, sir, I do.'


Q: 'And do you have a lock on your locker?'


A: 'Yes, sir.'


Q: 'Now, why is it, officer, if you trust your fellow officers with your life, you find it necessary to lock your locker in a room you share with these same officers?'

A: 'You see, sir, we share the building with the court complex, and sometimes lawyers have been known to walk through that room.'


The courtroom EXPLODED with laughter, and a prompt recess was called. The officer on the stand has been nominated for this year's 'Best Comeback' line -- and we think he'll win.

                                                NUMBER 2:


                                Now We Know Why He Was a General –
 


In an recent interview, General Norman Schwarzkopf was asked if he thought there was room for forgiveness toward the people who have harbored and abetted the terrorists who perpetrated the 9/11 attacks on America.

His answer was classic Schwarzkopf.


The General said, "I believe that forgiving them is God's function... OUR job is to arrange the meeting."

NUMBER 3

Dana Perino (FOX News) describing an interview she recently had with a Navy SEAL. After discussing all the countries that he had been sent to, she asked if they had to learn several languages?
"Oh, no ma'am, we don't go there to talk."

NUMBER 4

Conversation overheard on the VHF Guard (emergency) frequency 121.5 MHz while flying from Europe to Dubai.


Iranian Air Defense Site: 'Unknown aircraft you are in Iranian airspace. Identify yourself.'


Aircraft: 'This is a United States aircraft. I am in Iraqi airspace.'


Air Defense Site: 'You are in Iranian airspace. If you do not depart our airspace we will launch interceptor aircraft!'


Aircraft: 'This is a United States Marine Corps FA-18 Fighter. Send 'em up, I'll wait!'


Air Defense Site: ( ... total silence)


There is something about our military that makes other countries listen to reason.

3 comments:

Antonio Carlos said...

Well, well, well...

I think you went just fine with the first three cases, but incredibly messed up with this fourth one.

American military may be all great guys but you ARE NOT failure proof; just more well equipped, and that was the case.

Forgot what you all have done to Iraq, Lybia and many, MANY other countries? Come on! Give me a break!!!

Anonymous said...

Antonio....do realize this was about comebacks and NOT about your opinion of if our military was sent there
for a good reason.
Our military doesn't deserve remarks like that since they are not the one who decides which battles to fight or conflicts to be involved with.

Semper Fi

Spyderman said...

Antonio, you have conveniently forgotten what those countries have done to their own people, as well as people in other countries, but of course, why list any of those outrages when you can simply blame the U.S.?