Three Holy Men and a Bear
A Catholic Priest, a Baptist Preacher and a Rabbi all
served as Chaplains to the students of Northern Michigan
University at Marquette in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan.
They would get together two or three times a week for coffee and to talk
shop. One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn't
really all that hard, a real challenge would be to preach to a bear. One
thing led to another, and they decided to do an experiment. They would all
go out into the woods, find a bear, preach to it, and attempt to convert
it to their religion.
Seven days later, they all came together to discuss their experiences.
Father Flannery, who had his arm in a sling, was on crutches, and had
various bandages on his body and limbs, went
first.
'Well,' he said, 'I went into the woods to find me a bear. And when I
found him, I began to read to him from the Catechism. Well, that bear
wanted nothing to do with me and began to slap me around. So I quickly
grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy Mary Mother of God, he
became as gentle as a lamb. The Bishop is coming out next week to give him
first communion and confirmation.'
Reverend Billy Bob spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, had one arm and
both legs in casts, and had an IV drip.
In his best fire-and-brimstone oratory, he exclaimed, 'WELL, brothers, you KNOW
that we Baptists don't sprinkle! I went out and I FOUND me a bear. And
then I began to read to my bear from God's HOLY WORD! But that bear wanted
nothing to do with me.
So I took HOLD of him and we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one hill,
UP another and DOWN another until we came to a creek. So I quickly DUNKED
him and BAPTIZED his hairy soul. And just like you said, he became
as gentle as a lamb. We spent the rest of the day praising
Jesus..Hallelujah!
The Priest and the Reverend both looked down at the Rabbi, who was lying
in a hospital bed. He was in a body cast and traction with IVs and
monitors running in and out of him. He was in really bad shape.
The Rabbi looked up and said: "Looking back on it,
....circumcision may not have been the best way to start."
Wednesday, January 30, 2013
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