Do you suffer from Empirus Americanitus? The symptoms consist of a puffed out chest, lowered IQ, desire for violence, and a tendency to engage in and maintain illogical processes of thought. If you have three or more of these symptoms you should seek out a library straightaway. Immediately cease all television consumption and begin gardening therapy. The lack of violent stimulation, a lesser ignorance, and healthy diet should cure your Empirus Americanitus in just a few short weeks.