imgolfer » November 22nd, 2013
OPENING DAY OF DEER HUNT
You hear many stories about the goings on among deer hunters during the season. This is a reprint with tongue-in-cheek knowing most deer hunting widows and the general public have a little more faith in hunters today.
1:00 am Alarm rings.
2:00 am Hunting partners arrive, drag you out of bed.
2:30 am Throw everything except kitchen sink in back of pickup truck.
2:45 am Leave for woods.
3:15 am Drive back home to pick up guns.
3:30 am Drive like sixty to arrive in woods before dawn.
4:00 am Set up camp, find you forgot tent poles.
5:00 am Leave camp.
6:30 am See 12 deer.
6:31 am Take aim and squeeze trigger. Click!
6:32 am Load gun while watching deer run over hill.
8:00 am Head back for camp.
9:00 am Still heading for camp.
10:00 am Realize you do not know where camp is.
12:00 noon Fire gun for help and eat some wild berries.
12:15 pm Gun is empty again – 12 deer come back – strange feeling in stomach.
12:30 pm Realize you ate poison berries.
12:45 pm Rescue party finally arrives.
1:00 pm Rushed to hospital to get stomach pumped.
3:00 pm Arrive back at camp.
You hear many stories about the goings on among deer hunters during the season. This is a reprint with tongue-in-cheek knowing most deer hunting widows and the general public have a little more faith in hunters today.
1:00 am Alarm rings.
2:00 am Hunting partners arrive, drag you out of bed.
2:30 am Throw everything except kitchen sink in back of pickup truck.
2:45 am Leave for woods.
3:15 am Drive back home to pick up guns.
3:30 am Drive like sixty to arrive in woods before dawn.
4:00 am Set up camp, find you forgot tent poles.
5:00 am Leave camp.
6:30 am See 12 deer.
6:31 am Take aim and squeeze trigger. Click!
6:32 am Load gun while watching deer run over hill.
8:00 am Head back for camp.
9:00 am Still heading for camp.
10:00 am Realize you do not know where camp is.
12:00 noon Fire gun for help and eat some wild berries.
12:15 pm Gun is empty again – 12 deer come back – strange feeling in stomach.
12:30 pm Realize you ate poison berries.
12:45 pm Rescue party finally arrives.
1:00 pm Rushed to hospital to get stomach pumped.
3:00 pm Arrive back at camp.
3:30
pm Leave camp, still determined to get deer.
4:00 pm Go back to camp for shells.
4:05 pm Head out with gun loaded.
4:20 pm Come back to camp and see deer grazing in camp.
4:21 pm Fire gun. Hit parked pickup truck.
4:25 pm Partner comes dragging deer out of woods.
4:30 pm Stumble on log and fall into fire.
4:45 pm Throw burned hunting clothes into fire
.
4:50 pm Take pickup truck and leave partner and deer in woods.
5:00 pm Pickup boils over from hole shot in radiator.
5:10 pm Start walking
5:15 pm Stumble and fall, drop gun
5:20 pm Meet bear along trail.
5:21 pm Take aim, blow up barrel plugged with dirt from fall.
5:22 pm Bear departs, wrap gun around elm tree.
Midnight Finally arrive at home.
Sunday Watch football game and slowly shred hunting license and back tag as Minnesota Vikings fiddle away another game.
http://www.dinarrecaps.com/1/post/2013/11/late-friday-night-dinar-chatter9.html
4:00 pm Go back to camp for shells.
4:05 pm Head out with gun loaded.
4:20 pm Come back to camp and see deer grazing in camp.
4:21 pm Fire gun. Hit parked pickup truck.
4:25 pm Partner comes dragging deer out of woods.
4:30 pm Stumble on log and fall into fire.
4:45 pm Throw burned hunting clothes into fire
.
4:50 pm Take pickup truck and leave partner and deer in woods.
5:00 pm Pickup boils over from hole shot in radiator.
5:10 pm Start walking
5:15 pm Stumble and fall, drop gun
5:20 pm Meet bear along trail.
5:21 pm Take aim, blow up barrel plugged with dirt from fall.
5:22 pm Bear departs, wrap gun around elm tree.
Midnight Finally arrive at home.
Sunday Watch football game and slowly shred hunting license and back tag as Minnesota Vikings fiddle away another game.
http://www.dinarrecaps.com/1/post/2013/11/late-friday-night-dinar-chatter9.html
2 comments:
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I can relate. I grew up in the Midwest and went deer hunting one season. I spent the entire morning in a tree stand with the weather being just above freezing and something less than a drizzle occurring. I was soaking wet, cold, hungry and never saw a deer. The thought came to mind that I was missing the Oklahoma v. Nebraska football game so I climbed down from the tree and walked back to camp cold, wet and determined that I would never go deer hunting again.
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